HEAVY SIGH

When I first started to write this post I was super excited and happy but like always when I get on a high a low is quick to follow.
I'll start with the high: A few times a year the officers go through simunitions training (this is were running live scenarios of situations that can occur on the job with guns and simulated ammo, if the scenario calls for it just like as if it was really happening). My fellow traffic officers and I play the bad guy/victim depending on what is needed. This always gives me a strong adrenaline rush (which is the closest to being high I ever plan to get, admittedly I really like the feeling). Along with a couple of great days of learning, acting, and basically having the most fun I've ever had on a job (not to mention the great stories I have to tell now); several of the officers that I highly respect and look up to paid me some of the highest complements that I could ever hope to receive. One of which coming from a Sgt. who if I ever become an officer I hope to be like, he told me how much he appreciated all the hard work I do and that I am one d*mn good shooter. I can not express how great that made me feel. And several of the officers commented on my hard work and expressed how much they appreciated it. For a long time now I have felt like no one at work cared if I even showed up or even noticed the hard work that I put forth every day. But knowing that my fellow officers do notice really lit a fire under me to keep pushing myself and to keep giving my all.

Now for the low: Remember how I said I didn't feel noticed well that feeling is now back and on top of that I feel the administration is trying to push me out. Well we all got "raises" today. I say "raises" because my income only increased by a few cents. Were my fellow traffic co-workers increased by a great deal. I've been 'grounded" since Dec. '09 and no matter what I do or how hard I work there is no signs of this punishment ever being lifted. Just another example of the administration trying to get rid of me. And the grounding is paying a toll on my fellow co-workers too. They are having to cover areas that I should be working but can't because of this grounding.

So there you have it, my life in a nut shell. For every good there is always a bad, for every high there is always a low. I will still try to look for the silver lining but as far as finding one at work.... I've given up. This is not a phrase I use often and I don't give in easily but I just don't know what else to do.
God I turn it all over to you.

Great weekend

This passed weekend was one of the best weekends I have spent with my family in a long time. There was nothing rushing me there and nothing rushing me to leave. It was very nice and relaxing but chaotic too.
I got home sometime Friday afternoon and instead of going to the house where my parents live (and where I would normally stay when I'm visiting), I had to go to my grandparents' house, which is right next door. My parents were renovating their house; having the floor redone, walls painted, and new furniture. No one had access to the upstairs till Saturday evening, which is where my room is. So instead I stayed Friday night with my grandparents. One of my many cousins was also in town for a brief period this weekend. This cousin is one that I highly respect and adore, so it was great to spend some time with her.
I love my grandparents to death and since they have moved out to the lake I had not had a chance to stay the night with them (why would I when my room is right next door). It was so great to spend time with them and stay up late listening to stories about the past and family history. I've taken it upon myself to become the new family historian since the other one died a few years ago, so any opportunity to hear about the past is cherished greatly.
Saturday I woke up a little disoriented, not sure where I was and it didn't help to have my dog pounce on me as soon as I opened my eyes. (I love my little boy but sometimes he is to hyper). Mom and I did some running around looking for things I needed and things she needed to go with the new decor of the house. That afternoon I went with my aunt, great aunt, and grandmother to see a murder mystery play. It was amazing and very well done. And as we were walking back to our car we saw one of the performers from the play (the one that happens to be my favorite actor at the Alley theater). When we arrived back home, Mom had already cooked supper (spaghetti, my favorite. Yummy!!) and the furniture had been moved in the house. Needless to say I slept in my old bed that night, very restful.
Sunday church as usual, then Mom and I did some more running around. It was great to spend some one on one time with my Mom, I love her so. We caught up on the latest happenings in our lives and had so great mother daughter time. When we got home Dad was home from church, so the three of us worked on moving things around to their liking in the living room. Dad and I have always been close but not a whole lot said between the two of us outside of stories, so it was nice to just kind of chill and spend time with him.
It was a little sad to have to pack up leave but I and very grateful for the time I got to spend with my family this weekend and to not have the chaos of a bunch of family being in town. Thank you God for the blessings in my life and for the great family you have provided me.